Parenting Panel with Erika Olson
Singer/songwriter Erika Olson is inspired by her life as a mother in her music. She combines vulnerable vocals, contemporary storytelling, and musical influences spanning indie, folk, country, blues, Americana and pop. When pressed to describe her music, Erika likes to call it “folk with a beat.” On the verge of self-releasing her debut album, This is How I Pray, it has taken Erika several iterations of herself to get here. She’s learned that change is her constant and her power is her ability to start again.
Motherhood gave birth to Erika’s artistry and reminded her that she was wild. She found that her roots were better suited to cracking concrete than climbing ladders. She found she was not born to follow rules that did not account for her. Rather, she was born to bewilder them.
We spoke with Erika Olson in this edition of the Parenting Panel. So, without further ado, let’s dive in:
How many children do you have? And what are their names and ages?
Thank you so much for having me as part of your Parenting Panel Series! I love the work that you do sharing and promoting art and music made by parents! I have three amazing children relentlessly transforming and molding me into the mother that sits with you today. These forces of nature are Ziggy aged 12, Izzy aged 10 and Shepi aged 6.
Did you have fears or concerns about how becoming a parent would interfere with your artistic endeavors?
I was so oblivious to the manner in which becoming a parent would actually impact my life. I was an attorney practicing business litigation when I had my first child. I thought I would have a baby, enjoy a three-month lie-in with a tender bundle of snuggles, get into a great daycare and go back to work with a spring in my step. My delusion was at best hopeless naivety and at worst willful blindness. Needless to say, my baptism came by fire. My baby was nearly 5 weeks early, every part of becoming a mother hurt and I don’t think I slept a solid minute for 3 months. When I crawled back to work I just wanted to bow down and worship at the feet of every working mother I knew.
Prior to having children, I did not have an artistic endeavor with which they might interfere. Rather, becoming a mother so completely transformed me, that I could not help but create after bringing life into the world. Having my babies made me a creator and birthed my long-hidden musician, songwriter, and artist into existence.
In what ways has parenthood helped your creativity, if any?
Before having children, I would say things like “I don’t have a creative bone in my body.” But the moment I had children I went from seeing in black and white to seeing in technicolor. My children forced me to slow down and see the world in a way I simply could not – while going 100 miles a minute. Tears would run down my face while watching robins build a nest in our pecan tree. I would be overwhelmed by the colors of their feathers and the meticulous care with which they went about their day. I wanted to absorb the beauty, pain, joy, sorrow, frustration, and triumphs I felt and saw all around me. I wanted to tattoo my soul with the smell of my babies’ hair, the feel of their feather touch, the weight of their body asleep on my shoulder. I had to find a way to process the intensity with which I was experiencing life and music became my way to make sense of this new way of walking through the world.
What has parenthood taught you about yourself, your music, or your creative process?
Ahhh, parenthood has taught me I am capable of so much more than I ever thought possible. Since having children I see so clearly that I made so many choices because I was afraid. Sure I was a lawyer - I could argue with anyone. But I was so afraid of being anything other than perfect. I was paralyzed by the fear of letting someone down - my parents, my partners, my clients, my husband, my friends. I had no true sense of self - hence my hidden musician buried deep inside waiting for the moment she could take over!
But then I had kiddos and let me tell you - they are perfection busting machines. I now embrace mantras like - my house is a mess, I am not a mess. I know that I cannot have a creative practice, warm food on the table, a clean house, and happy thriving kiddos all at the same time. Having my kiddos inspires me to face my fears - for me that is abandoning exceptionalism and creating a business around my music.
I also want to add that being a mother has also allowed me to fully embrace the fact that I am not for everyone! That is one of the more liberating things I’ve learned, it allows me to write music without trying to appeal to everyone and just focus on what is true for me. If my music, my special brand of chaos, is not for you - no worries - there is so much else out there that is - go get it! But if I am for you, then babes, grab a cuppa and let’s catch up on life!
How do you juggle your family and your career? Who’s your support system?
My husband is the rock on which our little family rides out the storm. We have been together for 26 years. We fell in love when we were both still building the onion layers and now we are fully pulling them all back. None of this would be possible without his steadfast support and encouragement. He works from the city 4 days a week so the majority of the week it’s my ride or die kiddos and I conquering the English Countryside. But come Friday night - Dad is in full on family mode. He covers the kiddos when I need to travel or get away for sanity’s sake.
Has the pandemic taken away or added to your creative flow? Are you taking good care of yourself these days?
The pandemic added to my creative flow. It was just the slow down I needed to pour myself into writing. During the pandemic I reconnected with my writing tribe and found a whole host of other amazing writers out in the world. I rewrote almost every song on the album and added some new material that I am really proud of. I learned what my flow state feels like and how to get in and out of it with less fuss, a little bit of insight I hope to hold on to for a very long time to come.
I’ve also held on to a walking practice that arose in the midst of the pandemic. I found and fell in love with the amazingly expansive, intertwined network of footpaths and bridleways that criss-cross the UK. I had no idea anything like this could exist. I absolutely love exploring as far as my legs will take me. It keeps me grounded and allows for walking meditations - I am rubbish at meditating on a pillow.
Do your children inspire / inform your music?
Very much so - especially on this first album. Some of my music directly references my children. Other songs are influenced by the fact that I cannot escape the ways in which my perception has changed since having children.
Take, for instance, my latest single, “Hungry Little Bird.” It began with a friend’s struggle with anorexia. But the song grew to speak to all our desires to be seen and accepted just as we are. I could not help but think of my own struggles with body acceptance and my deep desire that my doubts and shame not burden my children.
Connect with Erika Olson via:
Website // Instagram // Facebook // Twitter // YouTube // TikTok // Spotity // Soundcloud